Address the Court, Please

After waiver court, I went to general district court, the focus of which is mainly traffic offenses and misdemeanor crimes. Another assistant district attorney was handling the docket, but it was a rather large docket, and I wanted to help. I did not conduct any trials today, but I stayed and watched a few. The following has a bizarre set of facts.

Charge: Assault on a Child Under Twelve.

The defendant was charged with assaulting a ten year old boy. From what I gathered, and granted I did not pay very close attention and left the courtroom in order to retrieve some driving records on unrelated matters, the defendant belonged to an after-school program that monitored children. This after-school program had the brilliant idea (by brilliant I mean absolutely ludicrous) of having a pie throwing event which involved children throwing pies at other humans.

Well, apparently, the defendant, although she did not agree that this pie throwing event was such a good idea, participated in it. The victim, a ten year old boy, threw a pie at the defendant who became angered that she got pie on her clothing. She chased (the defendant stated "followed") the boy across the room and retaliated by throwing a pie at the ten year old boy. At this point, the State's version of events and the Defendant's version of events differ. The State's version of events have the Defendant pushing the ten year old boy into a cubby area which left scratches and marks on the boy's body. The State did introduce pictures of the boy into evidence. I was not present for all of the Defendant's testimony, but I believe she indicated that the boy did not fall and certainly was not pushed into any cubby area. I was also under the impression that the Defendant was claiming that the pictures of the cubby area were taken after certain objects were placed there to make it look as if the boy could have been scratched by metal objects.

Once the Defendant presented all of her evidence, which only included her testimony, the Defendant made a closing argument. During the closing argument, the Defendant turned and started addressing her argument to my fellow Assistant District Attorney. It should be said that previously, while testifying, the Defendant asked the judge why the Assistant District Attorney was shaking her head and "smirking." When the judge saw that the Defendant was addressing her closing argument to the Assistant District Attorney, the judge stated, "Don't speak to the Assistant District Attorney. Please address your remarks to the Court." The Defendant immediately turned her back to the judge and continued stating her closing argument to the audience members. The judge then had to inform the Defendant that, by "the court," the judge meant herself.